women on wine (& 1 on tequila) searching for life’s answers!

Hey there my peeps! 

Yes, I’ve been away for a few days, but well, life is a constant, changing flow…and that it has been.

As of last week, I am gainfully unemployed…and it is all good.  Mr. G. and I have a lot going on over the next couple of months…transition time.   We have a plan in motion and with that, we move forward. 

I am on day 19 of my Bikram Yoga challenge and you wouldn’t BELIEVE what it has done for me.

Not being a yoga-bot, but listen here, folks, if you need any type of mental or physical challenge…you should do it.  If you are facing any type of unease in your life…you should do it.  If you are happy as a clam…well, you get the picture.  You should do it.

Things have been a bit stressful lately, but my yoga has helped to clear my head over the last 6 weeks and has given me a crystal clear picture of what is next for me.  For that, I’m so thrilled. 

Some people go their whole life not knowing who they are and what they want…some people pay thousands of dollars on bullshit seminars and self help books, and then the manuals, workbooks, etc. sit and collect dust on the bedside table.

Every morning, my head is clear and when I read my daily meditation, it helps me to focus on what I can do TODAY to be the best person that I know I can be.

The yoga challenge has helped me to step up my self focus, along with providing me a physical challenge I guess I never realized that I could do.  The last time I was this challenged was during my Air Force Boot Camp. 

(A quick side note, the physical aspect is kinda cool - Mr. G. actually said to me yesterday, as I reached up to get something that my butt was becoming more defined.  How cool is that? )

Quick little story about how much you can handle versus what you think you can handle. 

When I joined the Air Force, I did not have a day of discipline in my life.  I say that, but I came from a very good family, who raised us well, with tons of value and loads of respect.  Of course, I got grounded…and sometimes the wooden spoon, but all in all, our folks were pretty easy on us.  So joining the military and going to boot camp was a SHOCK to say the least.

I had never in my life been yelled at so much…EVER.  I couldn’t believe it.  Swearing and shouting, yelling and screaming…on some days, it was a bit much.  I cried most days, thinking my life was over.   But there were little glimpses of hope and I would pull myself up by the proverbial bootstraps and go on.   

Somehow, someway, our TI (Technical Instructor) saw that I had some leadership skills (read: stupid and will be a lackey) and made me a Squad Leader.  This was all well and good, but with any types of leadership, comes more responsibility - extra dorm duties, etc.  I didn’t mind so much, but often wondered what I was doing, as I sat Guard Duty at 4 am. 

When in boot camp, you go to bed exhausted…and wake up exhausted…and this happens day after day. 

One night, I get shaken awake, violently, from someone in my squad saying “Flood, get up!!! GET UP!!! Smith is bleeding…”

Without thinking, I jumped up and asked where she was…I was told she was in the bathroom.  Not knowing what to expect…I blearily, wiped my eyes to find her slumped over on the tile floor in the open shower bay, bleeding profusely.  She had slit her wrists.  I immediately jumped to action…applying pressure to her arms and delegating someone from the growing crowd to go get help immediately.    She ended up okay but with a medical discharge. 

(The reason she thought she should die was because that day during P.T., she fell out while we were running on the tarmac.  She wouldn’t get up and the TI shouted at her, told her she was a no good, piece of junk loser that would never amount to anything…she laid on the ground and weep, as we stood, at attention, facing forward…waiting.  It was awful.  Yet, looking back, there was nothing they made us do, that we COULD NOT do, you know? )

After this incident, life  in boot camp didn’t seem so rough…I finished the remaining 4 weeks like a breeze.  Taking it serious when I needed to and  learning all I needed to know to be a good soldier, but I also kept my sense of humor. 
I tell you this story, because no matter what the circumstances and no matter what life throws at you, you can handle it.  And you can ALWAYS  change how you feel about it.  Any time, any place. 

So back to yoga…it is a mind over matter thing…and my life is fantastic.

Find something you love and just do it.  Yeah, that means you…